Letting Go
Last Saturday, I arrived home from a much needed vacation. I have been to this particular beach destination many times in the last several years, and it has held a special place in my heart. In years past, I found solitude, peace, and joy spending time in the clear ocean water with the sun shining on my face. It’s where I have felt closest to the Lord. His presence never failed me and His creation renewed me emotionally and spiritually.
This year my experience was very different and it precipitated the need to “let go” of the familiarity of the past. I never stepped foot in the ocean because the water was too choppy and rough, and each day the lifeguard would post either a yellow or red flag which meant to use caution. The weather was not great either. No sun, just clouds and rain. The hotel appeared to need some attention which I attributed to the Covid-19 Pandemic as things are not yet back to normal. As a whole, the city did not seem to be thriving as usual and at times felt depressing.
However, I had a great time! During this trip I was able to experience God’s love in a different way, through people. My family, who had never been to this destination, were with me and although there were disappointing aspects of the vacation, we had so much fun. We laughed, played games, scoped out some really good restaurants, rode bikes in the rain, and found the most delicious gelato that we ate three nights in a row for dessert.
On the plane ride home, I realized that my trip is symbolic of how we can have certain expectations that are important to us, but God may have other plans. Maybe your ministry seems to be at a stand still and God places you in another area in which you never dreamed of serving. Maybe you find yourself moving from a city you love and know like the back of your hand to a place that is completely foreign. These types of transitions can be confusing and frustrating, and because of the anxiety associated with new beginnings, we may experience discomfort, awkwardness, and sadness when our hopes and dreams untangle before our eyes. My recent trip helped me see that “letting go” of my vacation expectations were representative of my personal life over the last year.
This year has been a process of letting go of one of the most important goals in my life, being a wife. Besides my faith, being a wife (and then later a mother) was my most important role. Unfortunately, on March 5, 2020 my marriage completely feel apart. I found myself in a major life transition with all kinds of feelings and wondering how I could possibly create a new life as a single person after over 20 years of marriage. Through the crumbling of my marriage, I had to let go of my dream and trust that life would go on, albeit in a different way.
My process of “letting go” has taken some time. Working through starting a new life at 50, unmarried, depending on myself, and not being part of a couple with an intact family has stretched me greatly. It’s not easy taking on a full load of responsibilities when you’ve shared them with your spouse for 26 years. There are many practical aspects of this process that I could discuss, as well as ways that I’ve found to be helpful in navigating my new role, but to be honest, I’m still learning. Maybe I’ll share more of these pragmatic steps in a later post, but for now, I want to share from my heart.
My recent vacation has truly showed me that although we may want good things, God ultimately knows what we need. As followers of Jesus, our most important role is to live to glorify God and to be the hands and feet of Jesus. We can do that in many different ways, none of which depend on our marital status. Being a wife may be one role in which I no longer live, but I wait in grateful expectation to see how the Lord will use me as a single woman.
I share these intimate details to possibly offer hope to others who are struggling to “let go”of something that they once valued as precious. While letting go of something that has shaped who you are is always a difficult process, Jesus promises us a new life marked by His grace, truth, and love. Grab hold of these gifts sweet friends, as they are offered to you in abundance. You are adored by your Father. Let go of what no longer exists and reach out to Him with your arms wide open. Allow His presence to fill you with newness each day. Here are some basic steps to help support ourselves emotionally as we navigate transitional points in our lives:
Be honest with ourselves, God, and others about our disappointment.
Ask God to meet us right in the messiness of our situation.
Be patient with ourselves as we acclimate to the new situation.
Be willing to ask for help from trusted individuals.
Trust God in the confusion and wait on His timing and purpose to reveal itself.
Never forget how deeply loved and valued we are by our Father.
Cling to Scripture and past memories of His faithfulness.
Friends, life is about “letting go” and moving forward. Where there is sadness, there is also hope for something new. We can hold both at the same time and still feel the richness of our experiences. You might be “letting go” of your health, mobility, an important relationship, financial security, a job you love, your church home, a loved one, or something else. The process of “letting go” affects our humanity and our spirituality. May you feel the undeniable presence and comfort of God as you journey through unexpected transitions.
Until Next Time!
Amy
865-670-0998